READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
