i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
