hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize