Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant

(978): View more from Massachusetts

Good decisions....

(401): View more from Rhode Island

Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up

Fav 7 2519 806
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(360): View more from Washington

It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.

Fav 22 4414 1583
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.

Fav 15 8557 1445
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(630): View more from Illinois

I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude

Fav 20 7605 1349
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(970): View more from Colorado

She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.

Fav 17 2702 5300
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(805): View more from California

He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.

Fav 23 1963 2628
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you

Fav 6 1035 2673
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(510): View more from California

Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.

Fav 2 756 500
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(732): View more from New Jersey

I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off

Fav 1 135 91
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