from now on my penis is your penis
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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