These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
