I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
