C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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