Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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