We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
