Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize