i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
