New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
