margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
