Whod you bang
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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