YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
