I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
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