There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
