we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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