It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I currently don't understand fingers.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
