i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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