i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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