wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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