I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Randomize
