those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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