Taylor Swift is so right about you.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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