hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize