just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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