My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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