so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
My vagina just clenched in fear
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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