I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
