you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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