whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
