I want to stick my p in your. b.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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