she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
