she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
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