Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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