oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
