I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
