Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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