so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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