Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
