quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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