Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Your penis caused this!
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize