I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
no you cant smoke seaweed
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize