In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
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