I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
