Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I have tasted many bathrooms
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
