she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
