I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
